Happiness: The 11 Reasons Why You're Not Happy

Happiness lies within you. Then why you're not happy? Do you find yourself wondering why you are unhappy? You need not renounce the r...

Happiness lies within you. Then why you're not happy? Do you find yourself wondering why you are unhappy? You need not renounce the riches to be happy or unhappy. Its all in your mind. The bigger the chase, the bigger the risk, the bigger the uncertainty, bigger the reward, the happier you get. Its not in really owning, possessing or renouncing these things. 
Note that happiness is something you have to continually pursue. It is not a state that you reach. There is no one thing you can do that will make you happy for the rest of your life. (And it sucks that fairy tales sell us that Happily Ever After crap. It's bullshit.) You have to keep having experiences, challenging yourself, giving back, etc.

Happiness: The 11 Reasons Why You're Not Happy
Imagine- "I used to spend long nights wide awake, wandering around our huge house, wondering what I was missing in my life. I blamed myself for feeling this way. How could I be ungrateful when I had it all—a beautiful family, an amazing career in journalism and politics, a successful business, and even the perfect house (white picket fence included)?"

No one ever said that life was easy, and none of us ever assumed that we'd get all that we desire without hitting at least a few obstacles along the way. But come on! Does everything have to always be so hard? If this sounds like you, take heart; you're not alone. And believe it or not, the answer to that question is no, it doesn't. Things don't have to always be so difficult. So why are you hitting all those brick walls? And more importantly, what can you do to stop hitting them?

I think many people wake up with this same question in their heads. Every morning they awaken with anxiety, dissatisfaction, and negativity. Every morning they begin their day wondering why things are so bad, why life isn’t fun and enjoyable, why a dark cloud always seems to hover around them.

Of course some people feel unhappy and negative because they are clinically depressed (Here are some key points to reduce stress and depression). They are suffering from an illness that impacts chemicals in their brains that affect mood. Depression is a serious condition that requires medical treatment, so be sure you know the symptoms of depression.
Here is a ultimate guide and simple tips for you, once you read it, I bet you will be happier ever. Click Here To Read If You Wants to be Happy.
You may not realize It, but these little things are making you unhappy, so here are _

10 Reason why you are not happy

You're Too Serious

Doctors' visits are serious. So are taxes and wars and meetings with your boss. Life in general? Not so much. Yes, life can have some pretty somber moments, but it's not meant to be lived in such a solemn state all the time.

How do you fix it? Learn to relax. Learn to loosen up. Have some fun and forget about all those serious aspects that are weighing you down, at least for a while. Don't worry about looking silly, and don't worry about what the neighbors will think. In fact, if they're thinking anything at all, it's that they wish they had the time or the energy or the nerve to get out there and have some fun like you.

You surround yourself with unhappy people.

We are products of our environments. If you are surrounded by people who are negative and unhappy, they are going to infect you with their mood. Identify the people in your life who are frequently unhappy, and try to spend less time with them. Seek out people who have a positive and happy demeanor and attitude.

Walking wrong way on life

A deep kind of happiness -- called "flow" -- comes from immersing yourself in very challenging work for long periods of time. Are you doing that? (Challenging doesn't just mean hard work. It's hard to lift heavy boxes, but doing so doesn't really push you all that much. You need to pursue something that seems a bit out of your reach, and you need to stick with it past multiple failures. Hard work is part of that but not it's not the whole story. The goal can't be just to have a feeling of accomplishment when the work is over. The process of doing the work must be deeply engrossing.)

People often find happiness via acts of generosity. You may be very generous, but you didn't list any charitable acts. This is something you might want to pursue. There's a lot of Science based around it. If you do good, you will likely feel good. But, again, you shouldn't expect to derive happiness from something easy: if you're rich, you're not likely to feel happy just because you give $100 to a charity. You're more likely to derive happiness from volunteering somewhere and doing hard work to help others. When was the last time you did that? How often do you do it?


You don’t like your appearance. 

In this youth and beauty-focused culture, it’s not surprising so many people feel unhappy about the way they look. It’s hard to feel attractive when the standards for attractiveness have been set so unrealistically high. Look around you, and you’ll notice that most people are simply average in appearance (especially compared to models and celebrities). Make the most of your appearance by taking care of yourself, exercising, and dressing well. Look in the mirror every morning and tell yourself you love and accept yourself just as you are.

What if there’s nothing wrong with you?

Instead of judging your body because you think it’s not thin enough to fit media-set expectations, try expressing your gratitude for its wisdom and its beauty, for all it’s done for you, for how it’s carried you through your life and still does.
"Instead of judging yourself for being foolish, you might congratulate yourself for daring to choose something different, something you feel is right."
If you find yourself wanting to switch career paths—to leave that perfect job for a startup or one that pays less but will make you happier—instead of judging yourself for being foolish, you might congratulate yourself for daring to choose something different, something you feel is right. 

You compare yourself to others.

The more we define ourselves by what other people have, how they look, or what they have achieved, the more unhappy we become. The constant longing for something different and the feelings of jealously that comparison creates will agitate you and make you feel unhappy. How often do you compare yourself? Pay attention to this and begin to drop this bad habit. 

You're Not Organized

Now don't take offense—I'm one of the most unorganized people you'll ever meet, a talent I come by naturally. And I can tell you with great certainty that it most definitely affects my ability to be as productive as I'd like to be. After all, it's not easy to conquer the world, tame the universe, and be all that you can be when you're surrounded by clutter and chaos.
Being unorganized creates unwanted stress. It makes it difficult to concentrate, and it almost guarantees that your schedule won't run smoothly. When I'm not organized, I'm forgetting things. I'm misplacing things. And I'm almost always moving in high gear because I'm running late. It's exhausting. All of these things suppress the creative flow and thus, your ability to problem-solve, daydream, and get things done. 

As a result, even the smallest of tasks can become monumental challenges, and by the time you've finally muddled your way through, you're no longer operating in that peak state where the really good stuff happens.

What's not working in your life?

Cut out those things that aren't working—and add the things and the people that make you happy. Sign up for that yoga class you never seem to have time for. Set aside a night to have dinner with friends who make you smile. Paint your office. Join Toastmasters. Go out dancing. Book that trip you've always wanted to go on. Shake things up!

Most of us keep creating our lives more or less within our comfort zone. Repeating slightly different versions of past choices feels familiar and helps us predict the outcome. Even though this often means that we recreate undesirable and destructive situations, we imagine that stepping out of our comfort zone to try something new must be worse. What would you choose if you knew that was a lie?

Who says that's true?

We’re all spiritually, emotionally, and physically aware beings. We pick up stuff from the world around us—and the result is that many of our thoughts, feelings, and emotions aren’t our own. Instead we pick them up in different conversations, situations, and motivations from those around us.

If you find yourself buying into a point of view that doesn’t feel right, ask yourself: Is this point of view mine? Did I buy into it somewhere along the line? Am I choosing what’s true for me or what everyone else is choosing? In the movie Runaway Bride, there’s a breakfast scene in which Richard Gere asks Julia Roberts what kind of eggs she likes. Her response: “Whatever you're having.” With each of her three former fianc├ęs, their favorite eggs had been her favorite eggs. Have you ever asked yourself what kind of eggs you really like?

You're Overwhelmed

In addition to struggling with organization, I also have a knack for taking on more than I can handle or, as my mother used to say, "spreading myself too thin." It's not that I want to operate at such a high stress level—it's just that I get excited about new projects and can't wait to get started.

As a result, I frequently have several projects running simultaneously at any given time and before I know it, I have too much going to really concentrate on any one thing. And if you can't give something your full attention, it won't reflect the benefits of all your brilliance. Stay in this state for too long, and you'll find that your motivation leaves you completely. You're no longer just feeling the anxiety that comes from being so "stretched" - you'll actually lack the inspiration to tackle even the smallest of tasks and when you do force yourself to take action, it will never be your best work.

You hate your job. 

Since we spend so many hours a day at work, if you hate your job, you are spending most of your day unhappy. But you do have the power to change that. What is it you hate about your job? Is there anything you can change about it? If not, then start looking for another job. Just giving yourself permission to look will give you a happiness boost.

Wrapping Up

Frankly, I don’t think it’s possible to “make yourself” feel happy. But I do know you can set up the conditions that foster happiness — and you can eliminate the conditions, thoughts, and behaviors that foster unhappiness.  Below are two tips to fill your life with happiness and if you need more tips here are the ultimate guide on how to be happy now and ever.

  • "Practice forgiveness. When we hold on to a hurt or a grudge, it’s like a thorny weed that continues to poke us and undermine our joy. Nothing good comes from staying angry or hurt. Let it go. Forgive. Move on."
  • "Practice your religion, spirituality, or personal growth. Research has shown that people who are active with their faith or personal growth are happier. They are focused on improvement and something bigger than themselves that removes them from attention on ego-based concerns"
Editors note: If you live in the past or the future, you lose touch with the present reality. That disconnection will cause longing which can only lead to dissatisfaction and loss of joy. 
Unlike what many people today say, no one deserves happiness; that’s something you’ll have to earn. I’ll go as far as to say that “happiness”—as defined by modern standards—isn’t even necessary and hard to come by for certain individuals. Everyone has their own path towards living life to his unique potential and there is no universal rule that applies to all. So while I haven’t really listed anything specific for the reader to strive towards, I hope I laid out some pitfalls that you can avoid in your journey.

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